|
|
 
The Tyrany of Polarized Thinking
by K. Scott Teeters - Reiki Master
Clip Art from http://www.fotosearch.com
I wish I could claim ownership of this concept, but I can not. I will tell you right at the beginning of this article that I first learned of this concept about three years ago from a wonderful teacher. Patricia Sun used to have a daily radio program on The Wisdom Channel. Every day, Patricia would talk about life, the world today, metaphysics, and why we are all here. I found her to have a wonderful, soft, soothing voice. Every time I listened to her program, I felt as if I was spending time with a wise “Ma.” She has that “Mother Earth” quality about her speaking.
One concept that Patricia talked about nearly every day was what she called “polarized thinking.” I am 51 years old and I can not remember a time when we were more polarized than we are now. Let me explain and see if you don’t see the same thing.
What is Polarized Thinking?
Polarized thinking is a way of thinking that immediately goes to the opposite of whatever is being presented. The most glaring example I can share is in the political arena. Ever since 1992 when Bill Clinton won the election we have been getting more and more polarized. If a Republican makes a statement, the Democrats immediately issue a counter statement. If a Democrat talks about a new social plan, the Republicans issue a counter statement. If a country or a leader that we don’t like says something, we rush in like air into a vacuum to say the opposite. If I talk about the benefits of eating a Vegan diet, someone almost always counters with something about certain body types needing to eat meat. an on and on and on.
If you ever saw the political news program “Cross Fire,” you know what I mean. It’s just a non-stop back and forth diatribe. Before I pulled the plug on digital cable service, I used to see a regular segment on CNN’s American Morning with “Kamber & May,” former Democrat and Republican strategists. Rarely was there any kind of meeting of the minds.
A few months ago I was in a group discussing the sad state of television programming. I mentioned that as a cable surfer, I’m appalled at the garbage I see being presented as “entertainment.” I must have hit a tender spot because someone in the group quickly shot back, “I completely disagree with that statement. When my kids were small we used to watch TV and then talk about what we saw.” (her kids are all adults now, so this had to be about 20 years ago).
It’s a funny thing because before I heard Patricia Sun talk about polarized thinking, I really wasn’t aware of it. Now I see and hear it almost everywhere. Polarized thinking has a quality of impatience about it. It’s like a snap judgment about an issue or an idea that almost totally dismisses what the other person is saying.
For me, it was as if I finally saw the pink elephant in the room. Now I can’t miss it and I see it everywhere. One of the skills that was covered when I was in life coaching training at Coach University was the “art of listening.” Being a powerful listener sounds simple, but is a real challenge in mental focus.
A Typical Conversation
Briefly, here’s what happens in a typical two-way conversation. Jane is listening and Rich is talking. About half way through Rich’s talking , Jane forms a conclusion about what Rich is saying and is forming her response. Meanwhile, while she’s thinking of her response, she really isn’t listening to what Rich is still saying. Now if she is reasonably polite, she’ll hold her tongue until Rich is finished with what he is saying, and then Jane responds with what she thought of while Rich was still talking. What she’s really doing is just being polite until Rich finally shuts the hell up so that she can talk! I think we have all done that a few times.
To become an intense listener, we have to stay focused on everything the other person is saying. Okay, maybe the first half might be dribble, but the pearls could be at the end! It must be a function of the ego that just goes crazy wanting to jump in and assert itself.
Let’s Do An Experiment
Try this as an experiment for a day. Within every conversation you have that day, stay completely focused on what the other person is saying BEFORE you consider your reply. In other words, really listen to everything the other person has to say, then think about it, and respond after you have considered what you just heard.
Here’s what will happen. The other person will be astounded that you listened so completely. Many people feel that no one really listens to them. The other thing that will happen is that they will feel your focused energy. Remember the wisdom from the Hawaiian Hunas who said, “Where attention goes... Energy flows... and results show.” The act of paying attention functions like a focusing device. When you are paying attention to what someone is saying, your energy is being focused on that person and they will feel it.
Another thing happens when you do this. People will begin to think of you as a brilliant conversationalist. That’s because most people love to talk about themselves and when you let them, they think you’re great. Being a powerful listener is also a very classy thing to do.
Being a powerful listener has other more subtle aspects that connect to polarized thinking. You will know and learn more because you are paying attention to everything. You will have the opportunity to really uplift others by listening and focusing your energy on them. You can be sending them healing energy while you are at it too. Also, keeping your mind calm and holding back on your responses gives you the opportunity to really consider a new idea.
New Ideas Coming Your Way
Imagine that, genuinely considering a new idea. Often times, a new idea can hit us like a brick. “What! No way! No, not going there! That’s the most absurd thing I’ve ever heard.” That’s what I said to myself the first time I ever listened to Alex Jones on the Jeff Rense Program. Alex is a documentary film maker and he specializes in what most would call, “conspiracy theory” issues. A lot of what Alex talks about is very complicated so I really had to listen. So I listened a lot, thought a lot about what I heard, and eventually came to the conclusion that the man knows what he’s talking about! But at first I said, “No way!” Ahhh, but then I really listened, some new information came in, and a new conclusion was formed.
(One of the things I have learned from Alex is about the phony “right/left, Democrat/Republican paradigm It’s actually bogus and is actually a cleverly constructed system created to keep people distracted with issues that take the attention away from what is going on at the global level. Globalist secretly fund both sides of an issue to create tensions as a means of distraction. I’m speaking of the New World Order. These are people with power beyond politicians.)
I’m sure that our high-speed lifestyles have something to do with our polarized thinking. “Instant gratification” is no longer just an expression. Not only do we want instant results, we form almost instant conclusions about ideas and are hence, polarized. I don’t have any illusions that 100 or 200 years ago we were dramatically less polarized and somehow have lost it. We just do everything faster now.
So, What Can We Do About It?
Polarized thinking is one of the most subtle aspects of our culture. Once you are aware of it, you will forever see the pink elephant. So, what can you do about it? Here are a few suggestions. Consider these ideas and if you come up with any others, I’d love to hear from you.
* Be aware of polarized thinking as you listen to others, either in person or on the TV. Recognize (not judge) that they are at some level, “asleep.”
* Be aware of polarized thinking that falls out of your mouth. Recognize (not judge) that at some level you are, “asleep.”
* Play the “Listening Game” and see how long it takes for you to develop the patience of mind to really listen to everything someone is saying before commenting. This is easier said than done, but it is possible. Think of it as “conversational meditation.”
* Share the Listening Game with others. After you get good at this, people will want to seek you out because they feel good talking with you. That’s because while listening to them you were extending your energy because you were focused on them. And you are giving them something they don’t get very often... genuine attention. When they comment on how they feel when talking with you, share the Listening Game.
I sense that polarized thinking will be with us for some time. But that doesn’t mean that we have to go along with it. There is a higher way. I’m reminded of a story I heard about Ben Franklin. While Ben had his unique human failings, he was still a genius and a master communicator. That’s why he was chosen as America’s first ambassador to England and France. Franklin would listen and listen and listen. And when he finally spoke, he would often say, “I may well be wrong about this, but it seems to me that......” And he would go on to share his thoughts. But his “I may well be wrong...” qualifier was known to take the steam out of many a situation.
So have fun playing the Listening Game. Enjoy noticing all the polarized thinking around you, and don’t forget to notice your own. Let’s stay humble about all this.
Scott - 9-8-05
Referenced websites:
Patricia Sun - http://www.patriciasun.com/
Alex Jones - http://prisonplanet.tv/
Jeff Rense - http://rense.com/
|
NOW AVAILABLE
To order the paperback version,
click the"Add To Cart" button
TODAY!
Just 14.95 plus 3.95 for S & H.
|
|
